The Average Person.
My name is Haris, I was born in 1990. An age of simple mechanical wonders, I was born in Faisalabad, a city full of middle class drama but it didn’t have any impact upon me not until I came out of my den or rather until it all came to my den.
I had to change many homes, schools. My father(a doctor) would frequently had his post shifted to different hospitals, I moved to many places and it made it difficult for me to discover myself and then I finally arrived at a home that seemed like a blessing from heaven- It was Punjab Medical Colony, A colony lush of nature and beauty. A dream home only fantasized, where I had discovered myself, It was here that I learned the important lessons in life… I found people I loved, Friends that cared and experiences that made me who I am. I was so very immature, still am.
I was a very controlled child thanks to my mother, she would keep a short leash on me. My world only consisted of waking up, going to school, studying and bed time. when I grew older it was obviously not enough for me, I wanted more, I yearned for friendship and company. My mother resisted but upon repeated protest she became soft. she would let me spend an hour of time with the neighboring kids. And that time was sufficient, it was enough to make me want to better myself. We would play sports outside every evening. I would try to fit in but most of the peers felt I was a burden and soon after, one by one they bullied me away and life moved on.
It was not bad, I had made friends that respected me– but then again it wasn’t as so bright either because my parents found it a perfect time to part ways,
As they did I was at a cross-road of choosing between one, I choose my father even though I had loved my mother dearly and had never really known my father – My mother kept him away from us, alas this choice of mine broke the bound between me and my mother but now at times I’ve wondered if I ever had any. I choose to not leave because this place was dear to me… it was what I called home, where I grew up. Came to know who I was and I didn’t want to lose myself.
People would ask me
why did you not step in?
… at that age I was offended by such questions and I quietly escaped from them, I felt people didn’t understand but now that I’ve grown I feel guilt seeing the damage… It was a task I could never find the guts to do, I felt rejected everywhere, my friends, my school, my relatives, my family. I sought comfort and found it no where I started to question my existence and the lessons I was taught to live. my question only grew bigger with each answer and ultimately I felt lonely, tired of having no one around to answer me.
what is the purpose of my life? why I do I feel so alone?
I started to get tangled in the world of self servitude and It didn’t take long that I was resented for it – I realized how empty being selfish was but that was good luck because I came to realize the values of the feelings we call ‘Love’ and ‘Care’, I saw them in my friends and family, a painful reminder of what I didn’t have… how beautiful and blissfully happy those feeling were. Being selfless and giving happiness… fulfilling expectations – a family, at that time of my life I had no one to share these realizations with… My friends were not who I would coincide with – I had no body.
But life has many twists and my time came; I found the answers I was looking for. I met people, people who made me feel like I am the most important person in the world, people who loved me for who I was, shared with me like I was their own and made me feel grateful for the gifted life.
My name is Haris Younis,
And I want you to join me in some of the most humorous, sarcastic, dark and miraculous moments of my life, To those readers that have read this… I am grateful of you. It doesn’t matter to me who you are or where you are from, I will always value your experience and words that you share with me, with my deepest sense and care.